2019 NFL Divisional Playoff Predictions

Wild Card Weekend was insane, and both #6 seeds pulled off big upsets, but can they do it again? We are now at the ‘Elite Eight’ stage of the NFL Playoffs, and the teams that got a week of R&R now have to fight on to the Conference Championship games. Who is going to get one step closer to immortality? Let’s find out with my 2019 NFL Divisional Round picks.

Last Week’s Playoff Picks: 2-2

Indianapolis Colts (10-6) @ Kansas City Chiefs (12-4)

Wow, the Colts knocked the Texans’ teeth out in the first half of last week’s game, quickly going up 21-0 and preventing Houston from scoring up until the 4th quarter. The Colts now go to the loudest stadium to take on the Kansas City Chiefs and second year phenom and MVP favorite Patrick Mahomes. The last time these teams played, the Chiefs blew a 31-10 lead, and let Andrew Luck come back in an insane 2013 wild card game. As I stated in my Wild Card predictions last week, the Kansas City Chiefs have only won a single divisional round game since they won the Super Bowl back in 1969, and that’s a thought that’s lingered in my head, but the Chiefs have too much firepower to sputter and be a ‘1 & done.’ This game is going to be a shootout between two generational gunslingers, and will come down to whoever has that last shot in the chamber. While it’d be great to see Luck lead the Colts to the AFC Championship, the Chiefs are going to win this game thanks to Pat Mahomes throwing for a ridiculous amount of yards and TDs.

Prediction: Chiefs

Dallas Cowboys (10-6) @ Los Angeles Rams (12-4)

The Dallas Cowboys have won their third playoff game since they won Super Bowl XXX against a very good Seahawks team, who didn’t go down without a fight. The Boys came to play this postseason, and last week Dak proved that he needs an extension. Unfortunately, tragedy struck as WR Allen Hurns destroyed his ankle while getting tackled, I wish you nothing but the best in your recovery. Now the Cowboys travel on the road to take on the Los Angeles Rams, who have a high powered offense. The Rams have looked very mortal over the past month, suffering 2 ugly losses to the Bears and Niners as Pro Bowler Jared Goff reverted to his rookie form and the Rams have looked very mortal, but they’ve had an extra week to get in sync against a very good Dallas defense. This game will be a battle between two of the best running backs in the NFL, Todd Gurley and rushing champ Ezekiel Elliot, and whichever RB has the better day, that team will likely advance to the NFC title game. As much as it pains me to say it, I’m going to pick the Dallas Cowboys to pick up the upset over the LA Rams and make their first NFC Championship game in 23 years. God have mercy on us all.

Prediction: Cowboys

Los Angeles Chargers (12-4) @ New England Patriots (11-5)

After playing a sloppy game against the Baltimore Ravens, the Chargers go on the road once again to take on the defending AFC Champion New England Patriots. The Chargers this year have been dominant on the road, posting an 8-1 record including last week’s playoff win. Their only loss on the road this year in a cross-town showdown against the LA Rams. The Patriots have been undefeated at home this season, despite boasting one of the weakest rosters they’ve had in years. Gronk hasn’t exactly been himself, with his second worst season of his career in terms of catches and yards, and a career low 3 touchdowns. The last time the Pats played the Chargers, the Patriots beat them 24-21. Another statistic, is that none of the remaining AFC QBs have ever beaten Tom Brady, including Philip Rivers, who is 0-7 in his career. The Patriots haven’t lost a home playoff game since 2010. This is the toughest game for the Patriots, because the Chargers have a very explosive offense with guys like Keenan Allen, a still reliable Antonio Gates, and Melvin Gordon. The strength of the Patriots is supposed to be their passing game, but they’re playing a team who can not only match, but out play them through the air. This game won’t be easy by any means, but I’m going to pick the New England Patriots to edge out the Chargers, and make their ninth straight AFC Championship appearance.

Prediction: Patriots

Philadelphia Eagles (9-7) @ New Orleans Saints (13-3)

The legend of Nick Foles continues to grow as the defending Super Bowl Champions scraped out a victory in Soldier Field thanks to Cody Parkey whiffing on a game-winning field goal attempt. Both teams tried to piss the game away, but Nick Foles found his clutch gene and threw a game-winning touchdown pass in the closing seconds. Now they have another tough test ahead of them as they travel down Bourbon Street to take on the #1 seeded Saints. In Week 11, Philly traveled down to the Superdome and were absolutely thrashed, 48-7. As we’ve discovered last year, and last week Nick Foles is a beast in the playoffs, besting the league’s top defense 2 years in a row (Minnesota last year, and Chicago this year). Even with a banged up secondary, the Eagles defense looked solid, but let’s not forget that Chicago didn’t have a top tier offense. Now they’re playing Drew Brees with a banged up secondary. I’m sorry Eagles fans, but the legend ends here for Nick Foles, as the Saints advance on to the NFC Championship.

Prediction: Saints

Advertisements

2019 NFL Wild Card Playoff Predictions

Happy New Year Everyone! The tumultuous time that was the 2018 Regular Season is over, and now it’s time for the “Adult Swim.” Yes, 12 teams remain and will battle it out for a chance at immortality. The road to the Super Bowl just reached its rockiest parts while on the home stretch to the ship. It’s time to see whose season will come to an end this weekend with my predictions for the 2019 Wild Card Weekend.

First, let’s look at the teams that earned a First-Round Bye.

New Orleans Saints (13-3)

The Saints started out the year on a white-hot 8 game winning streak thanks to dominance from Drew Brees and standout running back Alvin Kamara. This season had Drew Brees break Peyton Manning’s passing record, and miss his 13th consecutive 4,000 yard passing season by a mere 8 yards. The Saints defense was middle of the pack, but their offensive dominance and precision more than made up for their defense’s shortcomings. The Saints are poised to make a Super Bowl run, and the road to the Lombardi runs through Bourbon Street. Good luck trying to win in the Superdome.

Saints play the winner of Seattle @ Dallas, or Philadelphia if they win

Kansas City Chiefs (12-4)

For the third straight year the Kansas City Chiefs have won the AFC West, and are the #1 seed in the AFC for the first time since 1997. The Chiefs offense exploded with second year phenom Patrick Mahomes, who went on to throw for 50 TD passes and 5,000 yards in his first year as a starter. The Chiefs are looking dominant, but the playoffs have not exactly been kind to Kansas City. The Chiefs have won only three playoff games in the last TWENTY. FIVE. YEARS. Kansas City hasn’t won a divisional playoff game since Joe Montana was their QB, and that was the only one they’ve won since 1969. Let’s hope that Pat Mahomes can be the guy to finally end their playoff woes and make the Chiefs a superpower again. Hell, he may even be able to end the drought in KC.

Chiefs play the winner of Chargers @ Baltimore, or Indianapolis if they win

Los Angeles Rams (13-3)

The Rams have had two different looks in 2018. Over the first 12 or so games, they were 10-1 and their offense were putting up insane numbers, including 2 instant classics against the Minnesota Vikings and the Kansas City Chiefs (which is the greatest game ever played). Then once December hit, the Rams looked like a very different team. They’ve lost 2 very ugly games to the Chicago Bears and Philadelphia Eagles, then won their last 2 games against the Cardinals and Niners, which wasn’t saying much. The Rams get a week of rest, and should get their act together in the playoffs. The Rams have way too much talent to be one and done in the playoffs.

Rams play the winner of Seattle @ Dallas, or Chicago if they win

New England Patriots (11-5)

For the eighth consecutive year, the New England Patriots have earned a First-Round Bye in the playoffs. Pardon me if I sound shocked at this revelation. People are saying that Tom Brady’s in a slump, but he went out and had a surprisingly quiet 4,300 yard passing season. Yes, he threw 11 INTs this year, which is the most he’s thrown for since 2013, but he’s still playing well. The Patriots have been looking mortal on the road. Bizarrely this season, the Patriots were 8-0 at home and 3-5 on the road, and a road playoff game could be the key to beating the Evil Empire. Tom Brady has only played in 6 road playoff games IN HIS CAREER, posting a 3-3 record. Tom hasn’t won a road playoff game since 2006 against an upstart Philip Rivers. In his last 3 road playoff games, he’s lost them all at the hands of his rival Peyton Manning, once in Indy, and twice in Denver. The Patriots have a strong chance of making the AFC Championship, because they could play a Texans team with a bad O-Line, or the Chargers, who have looked mortal recently. Regardless, good luck beating the Pats at home, because the Pats have only lost 5 playoff games at Foxborough, in almost 60 years.

Patriots play the winner of Los Angeles @ Baltimore, or Houston if they win

Last Week’s Score: 14-2

Regular Season Score: 161-95

Now, on with the playoffs!

NFC Wild Card Game: Seattle Seahawks (10-6) @ Dallas Cowboys (10-6)

The Seahawks have had a very quiet 10-6 season, thanks to a surprisingly decent run game, and good defensive play. Like the Cowboys, they were 4-5, then went on a 6-1 run to sneak in the playoffs. Despite their defensive play, the Seahawks have relied on Russell Wilson to carry them to the postseason once again. The Dallas Cowboys have had a very ‘Jekyll & Hyde’ year. At the trade deadline, the Cowboys were 3-5 and everyone thought they were dead in the water. Then, Dallas traded a First-Round pick for Amari Cooper, then went on a 5 game win streak and played like they meant business (aside from a week 16 shutout against the Colts). Dak threw for 3,885 yards this season and really matured as a passer, while Ezekiel Elliot nabbed his second rushing title in three seasons. Although there’s a strong chance of Russell Wilson shenanigans, I’m going to pick the Dallas Cowboys to win their second playoff game in 23 years and move on to play the Saints in a high profile rematch.

Prediction: Cowboys

AFC Wild Card Game: Indianapolis Colts (10-6) @ Houston Texans (11-5)

Nobody thought the Colts would’ve made the playoffs at the beginning of the year. They were 1-5, with bad play on both sides of the ball. Then all of the sudden, Andrew Luck led the Colts on a 9-1 run to finish 10-6 and earn a playoff berth. Now, they go on the road to face a familiar foe in the Houston Texans, who have looked very mortal. Their offensive line has looked really weak, and their defense hasn’t been as dominant as they have been in the past, but still rank 12th overall. This is going to be another tight playoff game, but I’m going to pick Andrew Luck and the Colts to nudge by the Texans, then get ready to get blown out at Arrowhead.

Prediction: Colts

AFC Wild Card Game: Los Angeles Chargers (12-4) @ Baltimore Ravens (10-6)

In a rematch from week 16, the Baltimore Ravens host the Los Angeles Chargers. Both of these teams have turned it on late in the year, especially the Baltimore Ravens. After Joe Flacco hurt his hip, Lamar Jackson took over after the bye week and led the Ravens on a 6-1 record to finish 10-6. They haven’t been throwing the ball a whole lot, but have been just playing old school, smash mouth football. Run the ball down opponent’s throats, and play killer defense. The Chargers have won 5 of their last 6 games, and despite the slump in the run game, Philip Rivers has done more than enough to keep LA alive, and prove that he’s an elite QB. This is going to be a close game, but I’m going to go with the Baltimore Ravens to get the W, and head on to Foxborough.

Prediction: Ravens

NFC Wild Card Game: Philadelphia Eagles (9-7) @ Chicago Bears (12-4)

For the second year in a row, Nick Foles will lead the Philadelphia Eagles into the postseason, and he has a tough test ahead of him on the road against the Chicago Bears. I’m a bit worried for Nick Foles, because he got knocked out of last week’s shutout win over the Redskins, but Doug Pederson says that Foles will play. The Eagles are true underdogs this year, barely squeaking in the playoffs and the question on everyone’s mind is, “can they pull it off again?” They still have many key defensive players from last year, it’s just that the secondary fell off a cliff. Last year, the Eagles had a top 10 unit, this year they rank 23rd, giving up 366.2 yards a game. Now they play the Chicago Bears, who rank 21st offensively, but have the NFL’s 3rd ranked defense. Since the Bears traded for Khalil Mack, the defense immediately got better. Mack has been nothing short of dominant, immediately making the Bears from an afterthought into a playoff team. I sure don’t wanna be Nick Foles right now. He’s going into frigid Chicago, against that defense with banged up ribs. Yeah, this is gonna be ugly. I’m going to pick the Bears to win a tight defensive contest and get ready for a rematch against the LA Rams.

Prediction: Bears

 

2018 NFL Week 17 Predictions

It’s been a long year, but we are finally at the end of the NFL regular season. There aren’t any Saturday or Monday Night Games, meaning only one day to determine the remaining playoff teams. It’s been an entertaining and unexpected regular season, but now it’s time to close out 2018 with a bang. Let’s see who will win and who will go home with my NFL Regular Season Finale Predictions.

Playoff Scenarios

NFC

Clinched: Saints (NFC South and Home-Field Advantage), Bears (NFC North), Seahawks (Playoff Berth), Rams (NFC West), Cowboys (NFC East)

Rams clinch First-Round Bye: win/tie OR Bears loss/tie

Bears clinch First-Round Bye: win + Rams loss

Vikings clinch Playoff Berth: win/tie OR Eagles loss/tie

Eagles clinch Playoff Berth: win + Vikings loss

Eliminated Teams: Detroit, Green Bay, Detroit, Atlanta, Carolina, Tampa Bay, Washington, New York Giants, San Francisco, Arizona

AFC

Clinched: Chiefs (Playoff Berth), Chargers (Playoff Berth), Patriots (Playoff Berth), Texans (Playoff Berth)

Chiefs clinch AFC West and Home-Field Advantage throughout the Playoffs: Win OR tie + Chargers loss/tie OR Chargers loss + Patriots loss/ tie + Texans loss/ tie OR Chargers loss + Patriots loss/tie (Chiefs clinch at least a tie in strength of victory tiebreaker over Texans)

Chiefs clinch AFC West and First-Round Bye: Chargers loss + Patriots loss/tie OR Chargers loss + Texans loss/tie OR Chargers loss (Chiefs clinch at least as tie in strength of victory tiebreaker over Texans)

Chiefs clinch AFC West: Chargers loss OR tie + Chargers tie

Chargers clinch AFC West and Home-Field Advantage throughout the Playoffs: win + Chiefs tie OR tie + Chiefs loss

Chargers clinch AFC West: Chiefs loss OR tie + Chiefs tie

Chargers clinch AFC West and First-Round Bye: Chiefs loss + Patriots loss/tie OR Chiefs loss + Texans loss/tie OR Chiefs loss

Patriots clinch Home-Field Advantage throughout the Playoffs: win + Chiefs loss + Chargers loss

Patriots clinch First-Round Bye: win OR tie + Texans loss/tie OR Ravens loss/tie + Texans loss + Titans loss/tie

Texans clinch AFC South and Home-Field Advantage throughout the Playoffs: win + Patriots loss/tie + Chiefs loss + Chargers loss (Texan clinch a tie in a strength of victory tiebreaker over Chiefs)

Texans clinch AFC South and First-Round Bye: win + Patriots loss/tie OR win + Chiefs loss + Chargers loss (Texans clinch in a strength of victory over Ravens) OR tie + Patriots loss OR Colts-Titans tie + Patriots loss + Ravens win (Texans clinch a tie in strength of victory tiebreaker over Ravens)

Texans clinch AFC South: win/tie OR Colts-Titans tie

Ravens clinch AFC North and a First-Round Bye: win + Patriots loss + Texans loss + Colts-Titans doesn’t end in a tie OR win + Patriots loss + Texans loss (Ravens clinch in a strength of victory tiebreaker over Texans)

Ravens clinch AFC North: win OR Steelers loss OR tie + Steelers tie

Ravens clinch a Playoff Berth: Chargers tie + Chiefs loss

Colts clinch AFC South: win + Texans loss

Colts clinch Playoff Berth: win

Titans clinch AFC South: win + Texans loss

Titans clinch Playoff Berth: win

Steelers clinch AFC North: win + Ravens loss/tie OR tie + Ravens loss

Steelers clinch Playoff Berth: win + Colts-Titans tie

Eliminated Teams: Cleveland, Cincinatti, Jacksonville, Miami, Buffalo, New York Jets, Oakland, Denver

Now with the picks!

Last Week’s Score: 11-5

Overall Score: 147-93

Jacksonville Jaguars (5-10) @ Houston Texans (10-5)

The Jacksonville Jaguars are terrible. They’ve lost 9 of their last 11 games, and things aren’t looking much better because they’re playing the Texans, who still don’t have the AFC South on lock. The Texans need to win this game if they’re going to win their division, but they also need a tie in the Colts-Titans game.

Prediction: Texans

New York Jets (5-10) @ New England Patriots (10-5)

Sam Darnold’s rookie year has been a bust. Although he’s missed a few games because he got hurt, he’s tied for Big Ben for the lead in picks with 15. Now they head to Foxborough, Mass for their bi-annual mugging at the hands of Tom Brady and the Patriots. This game won’t be pretty.

Prediction: Patriots

Dallas Cowboys (9-6) @ New York Giants (5-10)

The Dallas Cowboys have officially clinched the NFC East after teabagging the Bucs, winning their third NFC East Championship in five years. We’ll see if they can make it past their first game though. The Giants have lost two straight games after slaughtering the Redskins, and things aren’t looking too good for the G-Men. Cowboys-Giants games are always close, and this game will look to be a battle between two of the NFL’s top running backs in Zeke and Saquon. I’m going to go with Dallas to beat the Giants, and potentially end Eli’s career on a bad note.

Prediction: Cowboys

Atlanta Falcons (6-9) @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers (5-10)

The Buccaneers crapped the bed against the Dallas Cowboys, once again putting up lots of yards, but not a lot of points. Thanks Tampa, you gave Cowboys fans a reason to be arrogant tools for a year. The Falcons have had a good season when it comes to offense, but their injuries on defense wound up costing them big time. I’m going to pick the Falcons to eviscerate Tampa’s bad defense, and end the season on a high note.

Prediction: Falcons

Detroit Lions (5-10) @ Green Bay Packers (6-8-1)

The Packers should’ve lost to the Jets last week, but A-Rod decided he wasn’t having any of it, throwing for more than 400 yards and 2 rushing TDs. The Lions have been awful this year, losing 2 straight games, including a humiliating loss to the Minnesota Vikings. In what has truly been a let-down for both of these teams, I’m going to pick the Packers to beat the Lions and finish what has been an awful year.

Prediction: Packers

Carolina Panthers (6-9) @ New Orleans Saints (13-2)

NOLA may bench their starters after they’ve clinched the #1 seed, but The Panthers collapsed after putting in Taylor Henicke. Even if the Saints don’t play their starters, they’re still winning this game thanks to a phenomenal showing from Taysom Hill and Teddy Bridgewater. Taylor Henicke isn’t going to win in the Superdome.

Prediction: Saints

Miami Dolphins (7-8) @ Buffalo Bills (5-10)

A battle between two eliminated AFC East rivals to close out the year could be a good game, but the Dolphins and Bills are two teams that have bad defenses, and inconsistent passers. The season’s been a loss for both of these squads, especially the Dolphins, who after a 4-2 start, went on to win 3 of their last 9. The Bills season has been awful. Nathan Peterman opened the year as the starter, and when Allen eventually took over, he got injured and missed several key games, which made Buffalo’s season even worse. I’m going to pick the Bills to end their season on a high note thanks to a dominant rushing performance from Josh Allen.

Prediction: Bills

Los Angeles Chargers (11-4) @ Denver Broncos (6-9)

The Chargers may have crapped the bed against the Ravens last week, but they have a chance to secure the AFC’s #1 seed. The Broncos got a bad Christmas present when they got humiliated by Jon Gruden’s Raiders on Monday Night Football. I’m going to pick the Chargers to win this game in dominant fashion, and do their best to secure the top seed.

Prediction: Chargers

Arizona Cardinals (3-12) @ Seattle Seahawks (9-6)

The Seahawks are back in the playoffs thanks to a surprisingly strong run game, and a good defense, and they just knocked off Pat Mahomes and the Chiefs in what was a season defining win. Now they host the Cardinals, who currently have secured the #1 overall pick, and the services of Nick Bosa. Since they have the #1 pick, they might as well preserve the tank by letting Seattle run all over them.

Prediction: Seahawks

Philadelphia Eagles (8-7) @ Washington Redskins (7-8)

Why the hell did the Redskins cut DJ Swearinger? I get that he made critical comments, but so did Mason Foster and he’s a frickin captain. I would understand suspending DJ, but not outright cutting him. He’s a hell of a player, and was the leader of a Redskins defense that can’t tackle. Now they host the Philadelphia Eagles, who need to win this game and the Vikings to lose in order to sneak into the playoffs. The Eagles shouldn’t have any problem whatsoever in dispatching of the NFL’s perennial infirmary.

Prediction: Eagles

San Francisco 49ers (4-11) @ Los Angeles Rams (12-3)

The Rams aren’t losing this game. The Niners may have given them a scare last year because they rested their starters, but the Rams have a chance for a First-Round bye. Even if Todd Gurley doesn’t play, the Rams shouldn’t have a problem here.

Prediction: Rams

Oakland Raiders (4-11) @ Kansas City Chiefs (11-4)

Pat isn’t going to sit because the Chiefs have a chance to get Home-Field Advantage. Not only will Pat hit 5000 yards, but he’ll throw for at least 4 TDs in the first half in what will be a bloodbath.

Prediction: Chiefs

Cleveland Browns (7-7-1) @ Baltimore Ravens (9-6)

The Cleveland Browns have had a great season, and if they hadn’t kept Hue Jackson and fired him after their 0-16 campaign, they could be in contention to win the AFC North. Instead, they could potentially play spoiler for the Ravens. This is a dream matchup between two Heisman Trophy winning QBs in Baker Mayfield and Lamar Jackson. It’ll be an entertaining game, and will be down to the wire. I’m going to pick the Ravens to edge out the Browns and get in the playoffs.

Prediction: Ravens

Cincinatti Bengals (6-9) @ Pittsburgh Steelers (8-6-1)

After losing to Saints last week, the Steelers now have a chance to miss the playoffs. However, they’re playing the Bengals. The Steelers always have the Bengals’ number, and since the Bengals have Jeff Driskel, this should be a walk in the park for the Steelers.

Prediction: Steelers

Chicago Bears (9-6) @ Minnesota Vikings (8-6-1)

The Bears have a chance to get a First-Round bye, and the Vikings NEED to win this game to get into the playoffs, but they host the dominant Chicago Bears. It’s kinda crazy how everyone had these teams completely wrong, myself included. Before trading for Khalil Mack, everyone had the Bears written off, and had the Vikings as a Super Bowl favorite after signing free agent star QB Kirk Cousins. This is going to be a tough pill to swallow for Vikings fans, because the Bears are going to win this game thanks to their dominant defense.

Prediction: Bears

Sunday Night Football: Indianapolis Colts (9-6) @ Tennessee Titans (9-6)

Just a couple of months ago, everyone had the Colts and Titans written off. Now they have a chance to punch their playoff ticket, and a division crown to boot. The Titans have won their fourth straight game, barely escaping a crippled Redskins team. The Colts beat the New York Giants The winner of this game could not only get a playoff spot, but win the AFC South as long as Houston loses. I’m going to pick the Colts to pick up the W over a mediocre Titans squad and end their season.

Prediction: Colts

 

2018 NFL Week 13 Predictions

Happy December everyone! As the weather starts to get colder, finals are looming around the corner, you can get some relaxation in this weekend with some football and hot cocoa. Can the Rams and Saints clinch their divisions? Most likely. This will be a fun week of football, and full of shenanigans for the playoffs. Let’s get the ball rolling with my NFL Week 13 Predictions.

Playoff Scenarios

Los Angeles Rams: Clinch NFC West with a win over Detroit

New Orleans Saints: Clinch NFC South with a win over Dallas, along with a Buccaneer win

Last Week’s Score: 11-5

Overall Score: 109-67

Thursday Night Football: New Orleans Saints (10-1) @ Dallas Cowboys (6-5)

The white-hot New Orleans Saints have won 10 straight games, and now the Dallas Cowboys stand in their path. Both of these teams had a dominant showing over a division rival on Thanksgiving Day, and this is a pivotal game in both division. Dallas has to win in order to maintain their lead, and if the Saints win, they have a chance of clinching the NFC South. I don’t see anyone left on NOLA’s schedule beating them, but this won’t be a blowout. I’m picking the Saints to try to firmly claim the #1 seed

Prediction: Saints

Denver Broncos (5-6) @ Cincinatti Bengals (5-6)

Things can’t get worse for the Bungles. First, their QB hurts his thumb and will miss the rest of the season. Then, it was announced that Hue Jackson (who has the second worst head coaching record of all time), has been rumored to be the successor to Marvin Lewis. Yeah, it’s no wonder they got slaughtered by their rival Browns. Right now, Hue is assisting in running their abhorrent defense, but if he runs the whole show? The Bengals would be beyond boned. The Broncos lucked their way to a W over the Steelers thanks to Big Ben throwing a goal line pick to a D-Lineman. I’m picking the Broncos to pick up the win, because the Bengals are going to continue their collapse.

Prediction: Broncos

Los Angeles Rams (10-1) @ Detroit Lions (4-7)

Detroit doesn’t stand a chance. Marvin Jones is on IR, and Detroit’s defense can’t keep up with the sheer firepower of the Rams. Rams are winning in dominant fashion, and becoming the first team this year to clinch a playoff berth.

Prediction: Rams

Cleveland Browns (4-6-1) @ Houston Texans (8-3)

It’s kinda crazy to think that the Browns and Packers currently have the same record. The Browns got revenge over their old head coach Hue Jackson, by teabagging the Cincinatti Bengals into oblivion. Now, they play the Houston Texans who have won their eighth consecutive game

Prediction: Texans

Indianapolis Colts (6-5) @ Jacksonville Jaguars (3-8)

The Colts have won their fifth consecutive game last week, getting a close win over the Dolphins, thanks to the greatest kicker of all time Adam Vinatieri. Good sweet Jesus, how have the Jags fallen so hard? They’ve lost eight straight, including a humiliating loss to the Bills. The F*****g Bills. Leonard Fournette is suspended this week for fighting, and the Jags decided to bench Blake Bortles for Cody Kessler. Yeah, Jacksonville is gonna lose their ninth straight. Indy could blow them out.

Prediction: Colts

Buffalo Bills (4-7) @ Miami Dolphins (5-6)

Ryan Tannehill had an okay showing in his return last week, throwing for 204 yards and 2 TDs. Maybe he can turn things around after Brocktober fell through. Now, they host the Bills, and I gotta admit. Josh Allen is playing a lot better than I thought. Yes, his accuracy leaves a lot to be desired, but he is a surprisingly good runner. Last week, he ran for 100 yards over the Jags, who surprisingly have a top 5 defense this year. I’m going to pick the Dolphins to beat the Bills, because Buffalo’s lack of a defense will cost them the game.

Prediction: Dolphins

Arizona Cardinals (2-9) @ Green Bay Packers (4-6-1)

The Packers may have a bad record, but the Pack also have the easiest remaining schedule, and Aaron Rodgers shenanigans mean that the Pack still got a shot at the postseason. They’ll get that rolling with a W over the sadsack Cardinals.

Prediction: Packers

Carolina Panthers (6-5) @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-7)

If the Bucs win, then the Saints clinch. Jameis Winston and Ryan Fitzpatrick have thrown a combined 23 picks, which is absolutely horrendous. Now, they play the Carolina Panthers. Oh dear. NOLA won’t be able to clinch this week, because Jameis is gonna turn the ball over so much, he’s gonna hand them the game on a silver platter.

Prediction: Panthers

Baltimore Ravens (6-5) @ Atlanta Falcons (4-7)

Lamar Jackson is going to start his third consecutive game, as the Ravens go on the road to take on Matt Ryan and the Falcons. Speaking of Matty Ice, a buddy of mine retweeted a tweet that shows that Matt Ryan is having an even better season statistically than his MVP campaign in 2016. The difference is, that in 2016, the Falcons weren’t gutted by injuries. Especially on the defensive side of the ball. This will be a tough test for Baltimore’s #1 defense, but they should hold out. I’m picking the Ravens to beat Atlanta, with a strong showing from Lamar Jackson.

Prediction: Ravens

Chicago Bears (8-3) @ New York Giants (3-8)

The Giants may have lost a close game to the Eagles, but their only bright spot is how well the rookie phenom Saquon Barkley has been playing. He’s had 100 scrimmage yards in practically every game this year, and has the same catches as Antonio Brown with 71. The G-Men host the 8-3 Chicago Bears, coming fresh off of a hearty feast in Detroit on Thanksgiving Day. Mitch should be back this week, which spells ‘doom’ for New York. I’m picking the Bears to decimate the Giants, and continue to show that they’re the real deal.

Prediction: Bears

New York Jets (3-8) @ Tennessee Titans (5-6)

The Titans got completely demolished by Houston on Monday, with Lamar Miller breaking off a 97 yard run, the longest in the NFL since he did it when he played for the Dolphins. Against the Jets. Speaking of, they got teabagged by the Patriots, and despite Sam Darnold not playing for the past few weeks, he still leads the league in picks with 14. Jesus Christ, the Jets have no hope for salvation at this rate. The Titans are gonna win big.

Prediction: Titans

Kansas City Chiefs (9-2) @ Oakland Raiders (2-9)

Oakland chose the wrong day to play the Chiefs. An angry Pat Mahomes coming off of a bye week after losing in a shootout means that no Raider will be spared, and his wrath will be boundless. Start everyone who plays for the Chiefs this week, because this game will be a bloodbath.

Prediction: Chiefs

Minnesota Vikings (6-4-1) @ New England Patriots (8-3)

In what will be a fun game to watch, many people’s (myself included) preseason pick for the Super Bowl will square off. The Vikings had a close win over the Packers, and a win here would be huge for their playoff hopes. Unsurprisingly, the Pats beat the Jets. Nobody cared, because it was to be expected. Anyway, this is going to be a close game, and a duel between Tom Brady and Kirk Cousins. I’m going to pick the Patriots to beat the Vikings, because the Patriots seldom lose at home.

Prediction: Patriots

San Francisco 49ers (2-9) @ Seattle Seahawks (6-5)

The Niners aren’t going to win here. Seahawks win, and I don’t need to go any further than that.

Prediction: Seahawks

Sunday Night Football: Los Angeles Chargers (8-3) @ Pittsburgh Steelers (7-3-1)

In a fun game that will determine who will be in the third seed, the LA Chargers take on the Steelers, who are on the verge of having 2 1000 yard receivers in JuJu Smith-Schuster, and Antonio Brown. The Steelers lost a close game to the Broncos, because Ben threw a pick to a D-Tackle. That pick made Brodie’s Sunday because not only did his Browns win, but the Steelers lost. In hilarious fashion. In what will be a shootout, I’m going to pick the Steelers to come out on top.

Prediction: Steelers

Monday Night Football: Philadelphia Eagles (5-6) @ Washington Redskins (6-5)

Can someone please tell me, how in the hell does a team go from having the #1 defense, to the #27 defense over the course of a month, despite adding an all-pro safety in Ha Ha Clinton-Dix? For the second year in a row, this team is gutted by injuries. Key guys like Paul Richardson, Derrius Guice, Fat Rob, Scherff, Lauvao, and QB Alex Smith, who may not even come back. Sweet Jesus Christ, the Redskins are up a creek and never had a paddle to begin with. The Eagles have beaten the arch-rival Giants thanks to Jake Elliot. This game is a very pivotal game in the NFC East, because with some shenanigans, the Eagles, Redskins, and Cowboys could be in a three-way tie for first place. The Eagles have won 4 of the past 5 primetime games against Washington, and will beat them again on Monday Night Football.

Prediction: Eagles

2018 NFL Week 7 Predictions

The trade deadline is approaching, which means some teams are gonna do some dumb last minute trades, and now the looming question on everyone’s mind is: “Are the Steelers going to trade Le’Veon Bell?” and “If so, where will he go?” There are a lot of factors going into week 7, and now you can make a viable prediction of the teams that’ll make it to the postseason. Let’s get ready for this weekend, with my NFL Week 7 Predictions.

Here’s a look at the teams that are on bye this week.

Oakland Raiders (1-5)

Man, signing Jon Gruden sure worked out, huh? They traded away their best player, and now they’re thinking of trading Amari Cooper? The Raiders can’t be serious. They’re tanking so hard it’s not even funny. Jon’s been out of the game too long, and now they’re stuck with him for the next 9 years. They can’t pay quality money for other coaches, and overall they’re just boned. This isn’t going to get any better out of the bye week, so get ready for the tanking of the century, but hey, we get another toilet bowl next week as the Raiders play the Colts coming out of the bye.

Pittsburgh Steelers (3-2-1)

After an abysmal start to their season, the Steelers have started to get their act together, without their star running back Le’Veon Bell. I don’t think he’s going to come in to the facility this week, and the Steelers have proven that they don’t really need Le’Veon after the season James Conner is having. They play Cleveland coming out of their bye week, and it’ll most likely be a competitive game.

Green Bay Packers (3-2-1)

Packers fans are happy for the bye week, so A-Rod can finally rest up a little bit, and heal his leg. The Packers’ horrendous defense is still a problem, because A-Rod had to pull off some of his trademark shenanigans AGAINST THE 49ERS. They don’t even have their star QB in. The Packers still have a chance at the playoffs as long as Aaron Rodgers is playing, but if they’re going to make a run, they need to improve defensively.

Seattle Seahawks (3-3)

Because of Russell Wilson shenanigans, the Seahawks are somehow a .500 team. The Seahawks aren’t good. Their defense is bad, and they still have a bad o-line and nonexistent run game. The Seahawks are bad, and need to do a basic overhaul in the offseason. Get a competent line, a competent running back, and some decent receivers. This is going to be a “blah” second half of the year for Seattle, and it isn’t going to get better than that.

Now, on with the predictions!

Last Week’s Score: 11-4

Overall Score: 56-38

Thursday Night Football: Denver Broncos (2-4) @ Arizona Cardinals (1-5)

I can guarantee that nobody wants to watch this crap fest of a game. Both of these teams are godawful, with godawful offenses and defenses. I don’t blame you if you watch basketball instead, LeBron makes his season debut tonight against Portland. That’ll be more entertaining than this game. In this snoozefest, I’m picking the Broncos. Not just because I believe the Broncos are slightly better, but because the Cardinals are just that bad.

Prediction: Broncos

Tennessee Titans (3-3) @ Los Angeles Chargers (4-2)

The Chargers avenged their loss to the Browns last week when they blew out the Cleveland Browns, and are hot on Kansas City’s tail in the AFC West. The Titans, got shut out by the Ravens last week, and are living up to their mediocre reputations. This game is going to get ugly, and it’ll get ugly fast. I’m picking the Los Angeles Chargers to pick up the W, and annihilate the Titans.

Prediction: Chargers

New England Patriots (4-2) @ Chicago Bears (3-3)

How on Earth did the Bears lose to the Dolphins in overtime? The #1 ranked defense got humiliated by Miami, and even got a touchback after Miami fumbled in the endzone. And things aren’t looking any better, because they welcome the Lord of Darkness and his troops. The Patriots won in a shootout against the Chiefs, and proving that the Patriots are still the class of the AFC. If the Bears are going to stand a chance in this game, Khalil Mack needs to make his presence felt and take over the game. If he gets to Brady, the Bears got a chance. However, I’m going to pick the Patriots to still win, but not because of Brady getting destroyed, but the Bears offense getting to a slow start.

Prediction: Patriots

Buffalo Bills (2-4) @ Indianapolis Colts (1-5)

Last week, the Bills were humiliated by the Texans. The Texans are really, really bad. And to make matters worse, their franchise QB Josh Allen is out for the next 2-3 weeks. Now, it’s Derek Anderson’s turn to start for the Bills, making his first start since 2016. Oh dear. The Colts are still awful, with no semblance of an offensive line, and no defense whatsoever. In this ugly game, I’m going to go with the Buffalo Bills (somehow). The Colts are horrendous, and are going to keep tanking, and get a top 5 pick.

Prediction: Bills

Cleveland Browns (2-3-1) @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-3)

The Browns are looking to rebound this week, after getting blown out by the Chargers. Baker played bad, completing less than 50% of his passes, and throwing 2 picks. The Bucs hung in there with the Falcons, but because of their horrendous defense, and the fact that Jameis Winston is their QB, they came up short. This game is going to be a battle of former Heisman Trophy winners, and I’m picking Baker Mayfield to come out on top in this mediocre matchup.

Prediction: Browns

Minnesota Vikings (3-2-1) @ New York Jets (3-3)

Adam Thielen barely leads the league in receiving yards through 6weeks, and is on pace to have 1000 yards within 2-3 weeks. The Vikings won only by 10 against the Sadsack Cardinals, which was pretty shocking. I expected a blowout, but now the Vikings travel to the Big Apple to play a surprisingly not trashy Jets team, led by rookie Sam Darnold. The Jets have been very “meh” this season, sitting nice and square in 3rd place in the AFC East, and can take pride in not being the worst team in New York. I’m picking the Minnesota Vikings to win, and try to get a leg up on the Bears in the divisional standings.

Prediction: Vikings

Houston Texans (3-3) @ Jacksonville Jaguars (3-3)

The only reason the Texans won last week, is because Nathan Peterman handed them the game on a silver platter. I mean, he threw a pick six right to Jonathan Joseph. Come on Bills. But The Texans, along with the Titans and Jags, are all in a three way tie for first place in what is the most mediocre division in the NFL aside from the NFC East. Last week, the Jags got obliterated behind the weak arm of Dak Prescott, and the dominance of Ezekiel Elliot. 40-7? Are yout kidding me? C/mon man. That’s some pathetic stuff right there. I’m picking the Jags to redeem themselves, and pick up the much needed division win, and try to get a lead in a very bad AFC South.

Prediction: Jaguars

Detroit Lions (2-3) @ Miami Dolphins (4-2)

Ladies and Gentlemen, the era of the Brocktapus is here! Tannehill may miss up to a month of action, which means at least 2-3 more games with Brock. Last week, The Brocktapus held his own against the NFL’s top defense (yes, he threw a couple of picks), and won in OT. The. Freaking. BROCKTAPUS. Wow. Now, he’s going to go against the Lions, who don’t have a very good defense. The Lions had a chance to get rested up on the bye week, Detroit isn’t very good, with their defense costing them games. I’m picking Miami to win, and the Brocktapus to keep the momentum going after a huge win.

Prediction: Dolphins

Carolina Panthers (3-2) @ Philadelphia Eagles (3-3)

What the heck happened last week Carolina? DJ Moore had 2 costly fumbles, and Cam Newton threw a pick that ultimately cost them the game against the Redskins. Now, they finish out their NFC East tour against the reigning champion Eagles. The Eagles had a dominant blowout win against the New York Football Giants, with a strong showing from Wentz, and the Eagles’ defense. I’m picking The Panthers to rebound, and get the win over the underperforming champs.

Prediction: Panthers

New Orleans Saints (4-1) @ Baltimore Ravens (4-2)

The Saints have a tough opponent coming off their bye, as they go on the road to take on the Ravens. After getting embarrassed by the Browns, Baltimore had a tune-up game last week as they shut out the Titans 21-0. Mark Ingram is back, and had a strong showing in his return game against the Redskins, as Brees became the NFL’s all-time leader in passing yards. This is a matchup between two powerhouse teams, and I’m going to go with the Saints. Their offense is too high-powered for the Ravens to overcome.

Prediction: Saints

Los Angeles Rams (6-0) @ San Francisco 49ers (1-5)

The Niners had a shootout with the Packers, but the Packers don’t have a good defense. Now, they’re playing the Rams who have a star studded defense, and one of the most destructive offenses in the league. Oh. Dear. This game is going to be very, very, very ugly. I don’t need to go on here. Rams win big.

Prediction: Rams

Dallas Cowboys (3-3) @ Washington Redskins (3-2)

One of the NFL’s greatest rivalries gets another chapter this weekend in a battle for first place in the NFC East. Cowboys fans are saying “The Cowboys are back!” after blowing the Jaguars out 40-7. Their defense played well, and Dak had almost 100 yards rushing, while Zeke ran for 100 yards as well. The Washington Redskins, have beaten their first “credible” opponent, in the Carolina Panthers after 4 consecutive incompletions from Cam Newton. The Redskins haven’t beaten Dallas since 2015, which I was there to witness. In what will be a close game, I’m going to go with the Washington Redskins (and no, I’m not being biased). The Skins are going to keep their momentum going, and beat their archrival Cowboys.

Prediction: Redskins

Sunday Night Football: Cincinatti Bengals (4-2) @ Kansas City Chiefs (5-1)

The Chiefs are on Sunday Night Football two weeks in a row, and we could be in store for another solid game. The Bengals had The Steelers beat, but they decided to be stupid and send the house on the last play, allowing Antonio Brown to score off of a mid-screen. Those shouldn’t work, but they bungled it up. Last week, Pat Mahomes was in a shootout with arguable the greatest QB of all time, and came up short. The Chiefs are still the top dogs of the AFC, and are going to beat Cincy Sunday Night in the loudest stadium in the NFL.

Prediction: Chiefs

Monday Night Football: New York Giants (1-5) @ Atlanta Falcons (2-4)

Jesus, what is it with primetime games this week and having awful teams play? Both of these teams have star receivers, but have crapped the bed. This game is probably going to be a shootout because neither of these teams play defense. Through six weeks, Julio Jones has 708, and still has yet to score a TD, which is mindboggling. I’m picking The Falcons to win this game. While the Giants will keep it close, I don’t think they’ll be able to keep it close enough.

Prediction: Falcons

2018 NFL Week 5 Predictions

Happy October everyone! It’ time for the weather to get colder, and for the football to pick up some steam. There are some important divisional games, as well as the 2018 Toilet Bowl. I hope that you’ve picked out your pumpkins, and broke out the flannels. Let’s welcome October right with some NFL Week 5 Predictions.

Before we get into the predictions, here’s a look at the teams that are on bye this week.

Chicago Bears (3-1)

The Bears’ season is the ultimate example of the impact one player can make on a team. Khalil Mack is single handedly changing games. Mitch is looking actually decent, throwing for 6 TDs last week against the Bucs. The Bears are going on the road to Miami next week, and I’m sure that defense will continue to dominate.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-2)

The Ryan Fitzpatrick gig didn’t last long. After crapping the bed in a blowout loss to The Bears, Jameis Winston now has the starting job, which means bad things for the Bucs because Jameis is very turnover prone. Sorry Tampa, have fun at the bottom of the barrel.

Now let’s get going with the predictions!

Last Week’s Score: 11-4

Overall Score: 35-28

Thursday Night Football: Indianapolis Colts (1-3) @ New England Patriots (2-2)

For the first time since the “Deflategate” game, Andrew Luck travels to Foxborough to take on The Lord of Darkness and his troops. Last week The Colts handed Houston their first win on a silver platter, with them missing a 4th down conversion in an effort for the game to not end in a tie. The Pats, put their rumors of demise to sleep by demolishing the then undefeated Miami Dolphins, and will look to do the same on Thursday Night Football. The Patriots are going to decimate the Colts, and try to reclaim the AFC after their slow start.

Prediction: Patriots

New York Giants (1-3) @ Carolina Panthers (2-1)

The Giants put up a fight against the Saints, but still let the game slip away thanks to their bad O-Line. Now, they’re playing one of the better teams in the NFC, the Carolina Panthers who are coming off of their bye week. It’s weird that Odell Beckham & Julio Jones, two of the best receivers in the game, still have yet to score a TD. Eli has got to get that man the ball, and getting OBJ the ball will be a key to giving New York a chance. But, I’m going to pick The Panthers to pick up the W, and have New York continue their downward spiral.

Prediction: Panthers

Jacksonville Jaguars (3-1) @ Kansas City Chiefs (4-0)

The Jags beat down the Jets last week, which honestly isn’t saying very much because the Jets are still horrible. Also, what the heck is going on with Leonard Fournette? This lingering hamstring injury now has Fournette out indefinitely, which spells doom for many a fantasy owner. The Chiefs, are unbeaten and are looking unstoppable. Remember that they were 4-0 this time last year and they collapsed due to horrible defense. Pat Mahomes now has 14 TDs without an INT, and is the easy front runner for League MVP, and will be playing against one of the league’s top passing defenses. I’m picking the Chiefs to continue their unbeaten streak, and stake their place on top.

Prediction: Chiefs

Tennessee Titans (3-1) @ Buffalo Bills (1-3)

In the past two weeks the Titans have beaten the Jags, and the Eagles. What the heck is going on? Their defense is still terrible, and Marcus Mariota is beating teams with one good arm. Now, they’re playing the sad sack Bills, who after beating Minnesota, were shutout by the Packers and a limping A-Rod. This week should be an easy tune-up game for the Titans, and everyone on the Titans will be looking like a superstar this week.

Prediction: Titans

Miami Dolphins (3-1) @ Cincinatti Bengals (3-1)

Last week, the Dolphins looked like how they should have been all year, as they got pummeled into oblivion by the Pats juggernaut. Even with that loss, the Dolphins are still #1 in their division. Now, they travel to Cincinatti to take on the Bengals, who are off to a surprisingly good start. They beat the Falcons in a shootout last week, and are looking like a wild card team once again. I’m going to pick the Bengals to continue their strong start, and give the Ravens a run for their money.

Prediction: Bengals

Atlanta Falcons (1-3) @ Pittsburgh Steelers (1-2-1)

Two teams with the most talented offenses in the NFL, have utterly collapsed this year. The Falcons have lost two of their starting safeties for the year, and now their defense looks completely inept. Despite Matt Ryan playing well, the dirty birds still lost by a point. The Steelers, kept turning the ball over and lost to their arch rival Baltimore Ravens, giving them a definitive lead in the AFC North. In what will definitely be a shootout between two of the league’s top gunslingers, I’m going with the Steelers to barely edge out Hotlanta, and send the crowd home happy for once.

Prediction: Steelers

Baltimore Ravens (3-1) @ Cleveland Browns (1-2-1)

The Baltimore Ravens decimated the Steelers last week, and are now the top team in the division. I guess you gotta put Joe Flacco’s job in jeopardy for him to start to play well outside December. The Baker Mayfield Era started on a sour note when the Browns narrowly lost in OT to the Raiders due to some bad officiating. This is a must-win for Cleveland if they want to have a shot in this division, but I’m going to go with the Ravens. They’ve been playing well and will continue that trend as they try to break away from Cincy.

Prediction: Ravens

Denver Broncos (2-2) @ New York Jets (1-3)

The Broncos are pretty bad. Case Keenum has underwhelmed, receivers are dropping passes, and the defense isn’t as good as they were. Then the Jets are The Jets. They suck more than a Hoover Vacuum, and haven’t addressed any of their other glaring issues besides their QB problem. In this game not a whole lot of people are going to care about, I’m picking the Broncos to win. No doubt about it.

Prediction: Broncos

Green Bay Packers (2-1-1) @ Detroit Lions (1-3)

It blows my mind that the Packers are a game or two behind the Bears. Despite their slow start, A-Rod and company have begun to rebound, and are travelling to the Motor City to take on the sad sack Lions. It’s rough so far in the Matt Patricia era, with a narrow loss against the Dallas Cowboys. I’m going to pick the Packers to win, and tell the rest of the league that they aren’t done yet.

Prediction: Packers

Oakland Raiders (1-3) @ Los Angeles Chargers (2-2)

The Raiders finally captured their first win, as they pried it from the hands of Baker Mayfield. Now they travel down south to LA as they take on the Chargers. Don’t expect the raiders to do well, the Chargers are going to win here and nobody is going to be shocked about that.

Prediction: Chargers

The 2018 Toilet Bowl: Arizona Cardinals (0-4) @ San Francisco 49ers (1-3)

In this toilet bowl, the Jimmy G-less Niners host the only remaining winless team in the league, in the Cardinals. Josh Rosen underwhelmed in his first NFL start, but managed to keep the game close as they lost 20-17. The Niners surprisingly played well, with George Kittle nabbing an 82 yard TD, and also barely lost to the LA Chargers 29-27. In the 2018 toilet bowl, I’m going to go with the Niners, because there’s no hope for Arizona.

Prediction: Niners

Los Angeles Rams (4-0) @ Seattle Seahawks (2-2)

Good. God. Last week was one of the best, and most entertaining games I’ve ever seen. 69 combined points, more than 1,000 combined yards, and one mistake is what it all came down to. Jared Goff made a strong case for MVP, throwing for 465 yards and 5 TDs. The Rams are 4-0 for the first time since 2001, which was coincidentally the last time the Rams made it to the Super Bowl. Many people said that it was a preview of the NFC Title game, The Seahawks, managed to beat the Cardinals, but their best defensive player went down for the year, and he flipped them the bird as he was carted off. Safe to say Earl Thomas is done in Seattle. Anyway, I’m picking the Rams. It’s the easiest prediction to make.

Prediction: Rams

Minnesota Vikings (1-2-1) @ Philadelphia Eagles (2-2)

Last week Kirk played one of the best games of his career, throwing for 422 yards and 4 TDs. However, a fumble cost the Vikes the game, but they played valiantly against one of the most loaded defenses in football. Now, they’re travelling to Philadelphia for a rematch of last year’s NFC Championship game, except Carson Wentz is playing. The Eagles are looking mortal, after losing to the Titans last week. This game will be close, because neither of these teams’ defenses are living up to their potential. I’m picking the Vikings to get their revenge, and defeat the defending champs.

Prediction: Vikings

Sunday Night Football: Dallas Cowboys (2-2) @ Houston Texans (1-3)

This is going to be a really crappy Sunday night game. Dallas isn’t that good, and Houston is terrible. The Texans were given their first win after a bad play call on Indy’s part. The Cowboys beat the Lions, and Dak threw a TD to someone not named Tavon Austin, but are still heavily leaning on Ezekiel Elliot. In this stinker of a Sunday Night game, I’m going with the Dallas Cowboys, because Houston is going to continue to trip over their own two feet, and stay at the bottom of the barrel.

Prediction: Cowboys

Monday Night Football: Washington Redskins (2-1) @ New Orleans Saints (3-1)

Drew Brees only needs 201 yards to break Peyton Manning’s all-time passing yards record, being the second record that he’s broken this year. He threw for 218 yards last week, in a win over the New York Giants, and yet another strong showing from Alvin Kamara. Kamara is currently on pace to rush for 1,100 yards and 20 TDs, along with 1,344 receiving yards and 4 receiving TDs, which is some ridiculous Madden numbers, and he’ll probably get another strong performance this week. The Redskins are coming off of their bye week, getting a chance for their banged up o-line to heal up and get some rest. The Skins have been playing very well so far, with the one-two punch of AP and Chris Thompson. Although The Skins will keep it close, I’m going with New Orleans to pick up the W in the Superdome.

Prediction: Saints

2018 NFL Week 4 Predictions

After last week, there are four teams that are .500 through week 3, which is something that has never happened before. Man, this is going to be a really weird year. We got a one game that looks like it’ll be an instant classic, and a few tire fires. Now four. Time to break out a beer and relax, with my picks for week 4 of the 2018 season.

Last Week’s Score: 7-9

Overall Score: 24-24

Before we get into the picks, here are a look at the teams that have a bye week this week.

Washington Redskins (2-1)

The Skins are looking quite well in the early part of the year, with Adrian Peterson playing beyond expectations, being fifth in the NFL with 236 yards on the ground to help boast the NFL’s 4th ranked rushing attack. The Redskins’ defense is also playing quite well, being second in the NFL in total defense, and fifth in passing defense. The Skins have a week to get ready for the Saints, the most potent offense that they’ll play up to this point.

Carolina Panthers (2-1)

The Panthers’ rushing attack has been dominant through the first 3 games, with 498 yards on the ground. Cam has been looking good, and using his legs more due to lack of receivers. The Panthers are doing a good job so far, but they’ll have to keep it up if they want to make it back to the playoffs.

Now, on with the predictions!

Thursday Night Football: Minnesota Vikings (1-1-1) @ Los Angeles Rams (3-0)

What the hell happened last week Vikings? This team got caught sleeping and got demolished by the Bills. THE F*****G BILLS. Are you kidding me?! Well, things aren’t gonna get easier, as they travel to LA to take on the Rams juggernaut. The Rams beat the Titans by 12, but the Rams still look unstoppable. In what could be a preview of the NFC Championship, I’m going to pick the LA Rams. Although their secondary is banged up, that loaded offense will be enough to carry them to victory.

Prediction: Rams

Detroit Lions (1-2) @ Dallas Cowboys (1-2)

Last Sunday night, Protégé beat master, as the Lions used excellent control of the clock to beat the Pats, and give Detroit their first 100 yard rusher in 70 games. Now they head to Dallas, to take on the Cowboys and their stout defense, and the NFL’s leading rusher through week 3, Ezekiel Elliot. The Cowboys still lack a true #1 receiver, and that shows with Dak’s shoddy play thus far. This should be a close game, with great performances from Matt Stafford and Zeke. I’m going to pick the Lions to pick up the win this week, and try to catch up to the Bears in the NFC North race.

Prediction: Lions

Cincinatti Bengals (2-1) @ Atlanta Falcons (1-2)

The Bengals have been playing surprisingly well so far, with a first place spot in the AFC North thanks to a tiebreaker. The Falcons, have lost both of their starting safeties for the season, which means that they’ll be getting exposed over the top, and their playoff future is looking a lot bleaker. Last week was the coming out party for rookie receiver Calvin Ridley, who hauled in 3 TDs in an overtime shootout loss against the Saints. The Falcons offense should scorch the Bengals secondary still, and be able to eke out a win against the Bengals.

Prediction: Falcons

Philadelphia Eagles (2-1) @ Tennessee Titans (2-1)

Carson Wentz is back, and despite the poor receiver play, the Eagles were able to beat the Colts. Now, they play the mediocre Titans who will be starting Marcus Mariota, who may or may not be able to throw a football. Philly still has a good defense, and the Titans offense is heavily lacking in firepower. The Eagles will win in what should be a cakewalk for Carson and company.

Prediction: Eagles

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-1) @ Chicago Bears (2-1)

Despite Fitzpatrick throwing 3 picks, the Bucs almost beat the Steelers, and Ryan Fitzpatrick has thrown his third consecutive 400 yard game. Now they go to Chicago, and play against the one man wrecking crew Khalil Mack and the Chicago Bears. The Bears had to come back against the Cardinals, being down 14-0 at one point. Thankfully, the Bears defense and Jordan Howard saved the day. In what could be an overlooked gem of a game this Sunday, I’m picking the Bears to pick up the W, and show the NFL that the “Monsters of the Midway” are back.

Prediction: Bears

Buffalo Bills (1-2) @ Green Bay Packers (1-1-1)

I was thoroughly shocked and surprised when the Bills beat the Vikings at home. Now, they play host to arguably the best QB in the league, Aaron Rodgers and the Green Bay Packers. The Pack were completely dominated by Alex Smith and the Redskins, with an impressive performance from their old buddy Adrian Peterson. Will Clay Matthews get another BS roughing the passer call this week? Probably, let’s be real. The Packers defense is still terrible, and that gives Josh Allen a chance to play well, but not well enough. I’m picking the Packers to beat the Bills, because even on one leg, A-Rod can still carve defenses up with ease.

Prediction: Packers

New York Jets (1-2) @ Jacksonville Jaguars (2-1)

How in the hell did the Jags lose to the Titans? Blaine Gabbert got hurt and the titans had to play with a still hurt Marcus Mariota who can’t bend his arm. It made 0 sense how that happened. I guess the Titans are the Jags’ kryptonite. What has been up with Leonard Fournette? The second year running back has had a lingering hamstring injury, and hasn’t played since week 1 against the Giants. If Fournette is back this week, then it’ll do wonders for the Jags offense, but they’re playing the Jets, who will still have to deal with some growing pains with rookie QB Sam Darnold, who last week threw a crucial pick to give the Browns their first win since Christmas Eve 2016. I’m picking the Jags to beat the miserable Jets, providing more crude humor for football fans to laugh at.

Prediction: Jaguars

Miami Dolphins (3-0) @ New England Patriots (1-2)

What is going on with the Lord of Darkness and his troops? The last time they had consecutive double digit losses, was in 2002, one of two times since Belichick was named head coach of the Patriots that they didn’t make the playoffs. The Dolphins, are off to one of the best starts that they’ve had in a long time and have firm control of the AFC East. Last week they assaulted Jon Gruden’s raiders, and let Oakland’s first win escape unscathed. I’m going to pick the Pats to get the upset win, and give Pats fans some semblance of hope.

Prediction: Patriots

Houston Texans (0-3) @ Indianapolis Colts (1-2)

Even with Deshaun Watson back, the Texans still can’t win a game. The Texans lost to the horrendously bad New York Giants. JJ Watt came back, and registered 3 sacks, getting his first sack since September 2016. The Colts played valiantly last week, losing by 4 to the Super Bowl Champions, going down to a Hail Mary from Jacoby Brissett. I guess Luck doesn’t have that much power in his shoulder anymore. I’m picking the Texans to pick up their elusive first win against the mediocre Colts.

Prediction: Texans

Seattle Seahawks (1-2) @ Arizona Cardinals (0-3)

The era of “The Chosen One” has begun in Glendale, and the Cardinals play their division rival Seahawks in Rosen’s first start. The Seahawks beat the Cowboys last week, with Earl Thomas getting 2 picks by himself, and helping clinch victory for his team. Despite this game being an absolute tire fire, people will watch to see what Rosen can do. I’m picking the Seahawks to pick up the win here, and try to play catch-up with the Rams.

Prediction: Seahawks

Cleveland Browns (1-1-1) @ Oakland Raiders (0-3)

Oh my God. It actually happened. For the first time since December 2016, the Cleveland Browns have finally won a game. Now, the Baker Mayfield Era has started in Cleveland, with Tyrod being benched after playing like crap against the Jets. The Raiders, licking their wounds after being thrashed in Miami, head back home in an effort to capture the elusive first win, only to get crapped on by the Cleveland Browns.

Prediction: Browns

New Orleans Saints (2-1) @ New York Giants (1-2)

Last week, NOLA’s defense played badly as Drew Brees and Matt Ryan engaged in a shootout. In last week’s win, Drew Brees set the record for the most completions in NFL history, and getting even closer to Peyton Manning’s passing yards record. The Giants got their first win last week against the poor Texans. The Giants’ defense still looks abysmal, and are in for a bad time against the Saints. I’m picking New Orleans to win, and win big.

Prediction: Saints

San Francisco 49ers (1-2) @ Los Angeles Chargers (1-2)

Let’s all have a moment of silence for the San Francisco 49ers season as their superstar QB Jimmy Garoppolo tore his ACL. Okay, moment over. The Niners are completely screwed now. I don’t know who else they have at QB (after looking it up, it’s CJ Beathard). The Niners would be lucky if they’ll win another game this year, I don’t even have to go in depth on this one y’all.

Prediction: Chargers

Sunday Night Football: Baltimore Ravens (2-1) @ Pittsburgh Steelers (1-1-1)

One of the most physical rivalries in the NFL gets another chapter as the Ravens travel to Pittsburgh to take on the imploding Steelers. They had to come back against Tampa Bay, and still aren’t looking like the playoff team that they were last year, but could still theoretically win the division. The Ravens boast the #1 defense in the NFL, with solid play from Suggs, Mosley, and Brandon Carr. Steelers-Ravens games are always close, and usually the winner of those games wind up winning the division. I’m picking the Ravens to beat the Steelers, as they continue to implode.

Prediction: Ravens

Monday Night Football: Kansas City Chiefs (3-0) @ Denver Broncos (2-1)

Pat Mahomes is off to the best start to a season any QB has had, throwing for 13 TDs and 0 INTs thus far, and is showing no signs of slowing down. I remember a couple of years ago watching the Tech-OU game with my friends, and we all said that Pat was going to be a nightmare for opposing teams in the pros. Well guys, we can proudly say that we were right. Which is bad news for the Broncos, who lost by 2 scores against the Ravens. If they lost to Joe Flacco by 2 TDs, then this game is going to be really ugly. I’m picking the Chiefs to win in dominant fashion.

Prediction: Chiefs