In the hellish landscape that is 2020, it looks like football is finally coming back. To be honest, I have no idea how long this season is going to last. I have hopes that it’ll go the full length of the season, but I’m not expecting it. Here are my picks for the kickoff week of the 2020 season.
Last Season’s Score: 163-93
2020 NFL Kickoff Game: Houston Texans (0-0) @ Kansas City Chiefs (0-0)
For the first time in fifty years, the Kansas City Chiefs are on top of the football mountain. Their first test in their quest for a retention are the Houston Texans, a familiar foe from last year’s playoff run. However, this is a Houston team without their game changing #1 wide receiver because Bill O’Brien traded him for an injury prone David Johnson, a moldy gas station hot dog, and a couple pieces of stale chewing gum. Without Hopkins, Houston won’t have the firepower to match Kansas City, and the Chiefs will get a huge feel good win.
Prediction: Chiefs
Las Vegas Raiders (0-0) @ Carolina Panthers (0-0)
The first game in the era of the Las Vegas Raiders is on the road in Charlotte. The Raiders built a solid foundation after tanking into annihilation with Josh Jacobs, Tyrell Williams, and Clelin Ferrell. As for the Panthers, they have a new regime with Matt Rhule, and Teddy Bridgewater looking to revive his career, but the offense still runs through McCaffrey. Literally. This won’t be much of a shootout and I’ll be going with the Las Vegas Raiders.
Prediction: Raiders
Philadelphia Eagles (0-0) @ Washington Football Team (0-0)
The offensive R word name has been retired (88 years too late if you ask me) and for the time being, they’re going to be called the football team. Ehh, it’s better than nothing but they could’ve done better. I’m excited to see the debut of #2 overall pick Chase Young, and how much Dwayne Haskins has improved in the offseason. They take on their division rival Philadelphia Eagles, who are hoping that everyone is healthy this time around. While this is going to be an entertaining game, I’ll be taking the Philadelphia Eagles to give Riverboat Ron a bad start in DC. Speaking of, prayers up for Ron as he began cancer treatment this week.
Prediction: Eagles
Seattle Seahawks (0-0) @ Atlanta Falcons (0-0)
Are the Falcons good? I mean, they have Todd Gurley, but I don’t know how he’s going to perform after getting arthritis in his knee. I’m interested to see how well Gurley does in Atlanta, because the dude is 25 and has a lot left in the tank. I hope he gets his career back on track. Seattle is travelling to Georgia & are hoping to regain control of the NFC West from Kyle Shanahan’s Niners.
Prediction: Seahawks
New York Jets (0-0) @ Buffalo Bills (0-0)
Tom Brady is gone. It’s time for a new team to try and snatch the crown from Darth Belichick’s icy grasp. One of these two teams could do it. Although the Jets had some misfires, they won six of their last eight games. They improved their o line and got some receivers. As for the Bills, they only got better with the huge acquisition of Stefon Diggs, giving theory cannon armed QB something they desperately need: a reliable big game wideout. I’ll be taking the Bills to pick up the W thanks to Diggs burning the Jets defense.
Prediction: Bills
Indianapolis Colts (0-0) @ Jacksonville Jaguars (0-0)
Minshew Mania will be running wild, but the Jags are tanking. They’re setting Gardner Minshew up to fail, and the #LoseforLawrence campaign starts with the Colts at home. The Colts are also in need of a long term solution at quarterback, but for now they’ll have to settle for a soon to be 39 year old Philip Rivers. After drafting Michael Pittman and Jonathan Taylor, they’re going all in on what little time Rivers has left. I’ll be taking the Colts to win because they’re the only team actually trying to win.
Prediction: Colts
Chicago Bears (0-0) @ Detroit Lions (0-0)
This season is the last shot for Mitchell Trubisky. This is as good of a chance to prove he should keep his job as any as the Bears go on the road to Detroit. This season is also the last shot for Matt Patricia, who has proven that he is incompetent as a head coach. I’m sure that Jeff Okuda will get a pick, but I’m still taking the Chicago Bears because they actually have an offense.
Prediction: Bears
Miami Dolphins (0-0) @ New England Patriots (0-0)
For the first time since 2000, Tom Brady won’t be the opening day starter in Boston. It’s the Cam Newton show now. This is Cam’s audition game and there couldn’t be a better opponent than the Miami Dolphins, who are fresh off of tanking into oblivion. Miami has some good new pieces in Byron Jones, Jordan Howard, and a quarterback of the future. I think that it’ll be a close game because Ryan Fitzmagic is alway good to start the season, but I’ll be taking the Patriots.
Prediction: New England
Cleveland Browns (0-0) @ Baltimore Ravens (0-0)
I feel bad for Baker Mayfield. Going into his third season, Baker is on his fourth head coach (Hue Jackson, Gregg Williams, Freddie Kitchens, Kevin Stefanski). As for the Baltimore Ravens, they’ve gotten even better in the offseason with their first round pick Patrick Queen & a healthy Hollywood Brown. As much as I have hope for the Browns, they’re going to get stamped into the dirt.
Prediction: Ravens
Green Bay Packers (0-0) @ Minnesota Vikings (0-0)
The Vikings aren’t looking too hot. After losing a lot of key players such as Xavier Rhodes, Everson Griffen, and Stefon Diggs, they’ll have to rely more on Kirk Cousins than ever before. And after their offensive coordinator went to Cleveland. The Packers didn’t exactly get worse, but they didn’t get better either, not even investing in a new weapons for A-Rod, but instead drafting his replacement. Even so, with the gutted defense in Minnesota I’ll be taking the Packers thanks to the might of A-Rod.
Prediction: Packers
Los Angeles Chargers (0-0) @ Cincinnati Bengals (0-0)
I was hoping that this was going to be a matchup between two top 10 draft picks, but the Chargers named Tyrod Taylor the opening day starter. But this is a momentous day in Cincinnati. We get to see the return of AJ Green and the debut of National Champion Heisman Trophy winner Joe Burrow. I don’t know how AJ Green will do because this is the first time he’s suited up in two years. As for Derwin James, he’s going to miss his second straight season too after having to get surgery. I’ll be taking the Bengals to beat the Chargers and give the Bengals faithful something they haven’t had in a long time: positivity.
Prediction: Bengals
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-0) @ New Orleans Saints (0-0)
This is the game I’m really anticipated for. Two of the greatest quarterbacks of all time going head to head. Yes, Tom Brady decided to leave Foxborough, Mass and take his talents down south in Tampa Bay. He’s got two great weapons in Mike Evans and Chris Godwin, plus a freshly un-retried Gronk! The Saints, like the Buccaneers are going all in to try to get a legend one last run at glory. I think this is going to be a points fest, Brady and Brees going back and forth to see which old man is the greatest of them all. I’ll be taking NOLA to win thanks to a last minute field goal.
Prediction: Saints in a nail-biter
Arizona Cardinals (0-0) @ San Francisco 49ers (0-0)
Two high powered offenses clash in the bay. Why would I say Arizona has a high powered offense? Kyler Murray and DeAndre Hopkins, that’s why. The unstoppable run game of San Fran vs the flashy offense in Phoenix. This game is one of my sleeper picks for the best game of the week, but I’ll be taking the Niners to win thanks to their bone-crushing pass rush.
Prediction: Niners
Sunday Night Football: Dallas Cowboys (0-0) @ Los Angeles Rams (0-0)
The Boys are in primetime as they face the Rams in a 2018 playoff rematch. But both of these teams have changed since then. The Cowboys fired Jason Garrett and got Mike McCarthy. The Rams cut Todd Gurley and gave Jalen Ramsey a mega contract. Speaking of, Ramsey’s contract has 71 million guaranteed. I don’t know about y’all, but that seems like a bit much for a DB don’t ya think? Anyway, this game is going to be the Cowboys flexing their offensive might on the Rams D, with Zeke bulldozing everyone and a great debut game from first round pick CeeDee Lamb.
Prediction: Cowboys
Monday Night Football: Pittsburgh Steelers (0-0) @ New York Giants (0-0)
This is a rough first day on the job for Joe Judge as the New York Football Giants host the Pittsburgh Steelers. The Giants have some potential with Barkley and Danny Dimes, but they’re still in full rebuild mode. I know Big Ben is coming back from getting elbow surgery, but the Steelers are one of the better teams in the NFL with a solid offense and a bone crunching defense. The first monday night football game is going to be a beatdown & the Steelers are going to look dominant.
Prediction: Steelers
Monday Night Football: Tennessee Titans (0-0) @ Denver Broncos (0-0)
I think that Denver is a sleeper team this year. After going all in on Drew Lock and getting him some weapons, their offense could be great. But with some bad news, Von Miller may have suffered a season ending injury this week, and that is going to be a huge blow to their defense. The Titans are looking to continue their momentum after going to the AFC Championship last year, managing to sign both Derrick Henry and Ryan Tannehill long term, and just last week signing free agent pass rusher Jadeveon Clowney. I’ll be taking the Broncos to win a close MNF matchup to cap off a hopefully great weekend of football.
Prediction: Broncos
Breaking It Down With DKown 